bluesleepy. Get yours at flagrantdisregard.com/flickr
2000-11-05

Late night ramblings
I should be going to bed... really I should be...

I don't know what's wrong with me tonight. One would guess, stress, right?? That would be a fairly correct assumption, knowing that I have a graphics program due Tuesday that isn't fully functional, and a quiz tomorrow and I haven't looked at the material very closely yet. But it's not stress -- it can't be. It doesn't feel the same way. This feeling is more just queasiness in my stomach that Tums seemed to ameliorate for a while.

Isn't "ameliorate" an awesome word?? I got it from Piers Anthony and his Xanth novels. In just about every book, he uses that word. I guess it's not that big a deal, but "ameliorate" isn't one of those words that you hear on the street every day, so its appearance in every book I've read by him is somewhat amazing. I had to look it up after a while. I'm too lazy to look up a word I don't know the first time I see it, and if I'm close to my dad while I'm reading, I'll just ask him. But after coming across "ameliorate" with each successive novel, I had to find out what it means. Which, for those of you who, like me, are too lazy to look it up, dear, is something along the lines of "to make better, assuage, etc." Ameliorate just fits much better than either of those two expressions.

So anyhow, I took the Tums and felt a bit better. But now the slight queasiness is back. Maybe it's the mini Red Baron pizza I had tonight... I know it's not stress because I'm not thinking of the stuff I have to do. I guess maybe I'm just ill.

I usually drive on the way back from the boyfriend's house, which is an hour's drive, give or take a few minutes, and we were approaching the Walmart almost halfway between the two points, and I asked to stop by there so I can find some winter clothes. Part of it was just a need to procrastinate my getting back to campus -- I felt I needed to get back as soon as possible, even though I had the majority of my work done, but I wanted a bit more time with Kurt. But as I was driving, I realized I wasn't paying attention to the other cars or to where I was going. I had to concentrate solely on keeping the car between the white lines. I was spacing out -- and it was scary. It was only a mile or two to the Walmart at that point, so I kept driving, but I told Kurt I was going to let him drive the rest of the way back to campus.

On the way to campus, I put the seat back and listened to a special on the radio about Pink Floyd, and just enjoyed the music sweeping over me. I didn't want it to end -- it felt so damned good.

In other news -- yes, the Raiders won tonight, as did the Titans. Kurt prefers the Raiders, and I like the Titans, and right now, they're both 8-1. I hope they don't end up in the playoffs -- Kurt's threatening to put up tape to divide the couch, one half for Raiders fans and the other half for Titans fans. :o)

Kurt's corrupted me into liking football. I always swore it was the stupidest of games out there, and that it doesn't take as much talent to play football as it does to hit a baseball going 90+ mph with a bat that's something like four inches in diameter, and get it to go at least 350 feet over the right or left field fence. But Kurt's seduced me into liking football. I don't usually care who's winning, but I'm sad if we don't watch a game. Kurt won't watch a game if it's between two teams that suck, but I don't care who's playing. I ask Kurt who I'm to root for (since he knows who's in what standing in which division), and then I get all excited for that team as the game wears on. I even cussed out the Jets today when they couldn't manage to score a touchdown to tie the game when they were on the two-yard line. I've got it bad, methinks....

OK, going to bed...




previous * next